It doesn’t matter whether it’s a customer, client, child, spouse, co-worker, or members of a board or committee. You must connect in the manner that resonates with them. It sounds difficult, but it really isn’t once you start practicing it.

Types of communication:

Informing – Some people just want the facts laid out for them. They pay attention to facts and figures, studies and other concrete data.

Analyzing – These people don’t want specific facts, but rather a summary. You need to offer an analysis and boil down the information or request in a meaningful matter.

Persuasive – This type of person wants to know what’s in it for them. Why should they agree to act in a certain way or perform a specific action? They must be convinced. Present your argument.

Mediating – Compromise, compromise. With these people, you have to be willing to give a little. They need to feel heard and respected. Find the common ground and find the solution that satisfies you both.

Emotional – This kind of communication is all about feelings. Knowing what is important and what touches these people is the key. Appeal to their emotions and connect on a compassionate and understanding level.

Entertaining – Wit, humor and levity influences these people. Serious facts are useless, be interesting and lighthearted when possible.

Inspiring – Offer motivation, inspiration, and big picture results. These people need to feel as though they are making a difference, some kind of impact.

The way to practice communication that is more effective requires that you improve your observation and listening skills. Pay attention to the people around you and be more interested in general. We could all use a little more of that.

What type of communicator are you? It helps to understand that too.

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“Slow down and enjoy life. It’s not only the scenery you miss by going too fast – you also miss the sense of where you are going and why.” Eddie Cantor

Slow down! You may be missing something important…your life.

This time of year it’s more important than ever to slow down and enjoy your life. Unfortunately for most of us this is also the busiest time of year; shopping, wrapping, socializing and we still have to keep up with our work obligations and family responsibilities. It doesn’t leave much time for holiday cheer, let alone, time to take in the scenery.

Unless we make a conscious decision to do so. You can make excuses all day long. In the end the choice is yours. As a “busyholic in recovery” I can tell you that I get it. I understand the avalanche of tasks, the never-ending demands, and the bottomless inbox. I get it. I really do. But to what end? Where are you going and why?

I can tell you where I am going!

I am going to sit and enjoy one more Christmas concert and actually listen to the children singing and playing their hearts out instead of lamenting over the chores that are waiting for me at home and what I could have gotten done if I didn’t have to attend.

I am going to sit and play Othello and Battleship with my son in front of the fire instead of making one more trip to the mall for that “perfect” present.

I am going to cuddle and rock my smoochable grandbaby instead of trekking back up to my office late at night for one more work session.

I am going to drink coffee with my husband and watch the snowflakes fall instead of checking my email on a Sunday morning.

Where are you going? Can you slow down and enjoy your life more?

And really why shouldn’t you? Despite the fact that it is often serious and at times difficult, life really does play out much like a game. We compete against each other and sometimes work in teams. We try to accumulate possessions and titles as if they were points on the scoreboard. We advance by a combination of choices, strategy and sheer luck.

So why shouldn’t we get a score?

Only in this case you are the only one who can decide how many points you are awarded…

Let’s have some fun and find out how we are doing at the game of life.

Give yourself from 1 – 20 points in each of the 5 areas based on how well you think you are doing.

Health – How is your health? Consider your weight, diet, fitness and energy as well as any health problems you may have.

Relationships – How are your relationships? How deep and fulfilling is your relationship with your significant other, your children, your parents or your siblings. How about your friends?

Career – How satisfied are you with your career or business life? Are you content? Are you contributing meaningful work? Are you doing something you enjoy? Are you being valued appropriately?

Happiness – How happy are you? Really? Do you feel good about your life? Do you have a hopeful, positive attitude? Do you feel a sense of balance or are you feeling unstable or overwhelmed?

Money – This is not about how much money you have, but with your perception of it. Do you have enough money? Are you responsible in your managing of your money? Do you feel secure about money? Or are you always worried?

Now add up your score in each area to get your “Life Score.”

Your score is yours alone. You do not have to share. It’s not about comparing or competing with anyone other than yourself. You decide what it means and what, if anything, you’d like to do about it.

My scoring guidelines:

75-100 – You are either lying to yourself…or you really know what you want out of life and are making good decisions and taking consistent action to keep moving in a positive direction.

50-74 – You are probably making good choices much of the time and may have some idea of what you want out of life, but there is room for improvement. You may have a nagging health issue or be worried about money or unhappy in your career. Or you may just be juggling everything pretty well, but feel that you can do better.

25-49 – You probably aren’t really clear on what you want or what you should be doing.  You know that your choices could be better, but you just can’t seem to take consistent action toward your goals. Or you are so focused on one aspect of your life that the others are completely suffering. You could use some help.

0-24 – You desperately need help! You are totally missing out on the fullness of what life has to offer you. But you can make changes. It’s not hopeless; not at all.

How did you do? Are you happy with your life score?

If you are…. Congratulations! Good job!

If you’re not… You can do better. Change is possible and it’s doesn’t even have to be that hard. You might benefit from coaching, from self-discovery, life planning or clear goal setting. The good news is that much of your life is within your control. Yes, there is an element of luck and circumstances, but to a large extent you have the power.

Your power lies in your choices, your actions and your attitude.

How you use that power determines the outcome and experience of your life.

Care to share? How satisfied are you with your life score? What will you do about it?

Question everything, move forward, enjoy the journey.